Real RVA Wedding: The Road to Tatem

The Proposal

Even before the proposal, Tiffany and Terrell knew they would have a destination wedding… but before they hit the road to Elizabeth City, North Carolina, they celebrated a 40th birthday.

Tiffany’s birthday, to be exact; and this is where our story of love shall begin- making plans and deciding how Tiffany would bring in forty. While she was going back and forth between doing a birthday photoshoot or a big shindig, Terrell stayed occupied by being nosey… In the end, Tiffany chose to celebrate this life event with a quiet brunch among family and friends, and also inviting their favorite photographer to come capture some candid shots of the birthday girl with her loved ones. Unbeknownst to Tiffany, Terrell’s nosiness was in full effect, he contacted Erica, photographer, bringing her on board with his behind the scenes plans for a wedding proposal.

Everything was set and ready; Erica gathered the assembled family and friends  on the patio and began clicking away. She positioned people this way and that, all the while, working to pull Tiffany to the front and separating her from everyone else. Without missing a beat, Erica instructed Tiffany to turn around and there was Terrell on one knee. Even though Terrell had prepared for this moment by talking with his soon to be father in law, no one knew that this would be the day and as the time drew closer, he became more and more anxious. (Though, he obviously had nothing to be concerned about, as Terrell says, “there was never any doubt she’d say yes”.) Tiffany, along with everyone else, never saw it coming and Terrell pulled off his surprise birthday present.

Wedding Planning Begins

Having proposed, the two set a date almost immediately- August 17, 2024 and the planning began with a flurry. (well as soon as the couple returned from a family cruise they went on the day after the proposal) One of the first conversations Tiffany and Terrell had was about venues and colors. Tiffany was adamant that their wedding color would be all black and their wedding would be a black tie affair in Elizabeth City, the college town where they had met. Terrell wasn’t on board with an all black wedding at first but came around in the end; “if that’s what she wants, I’m going to give her what she wants” and that color choice might have been the best decision made for the wedding because it really brought everything together, Terrell mused. A month after becoming an engaged woman, Tiffany’s family came in for Thanksgiving and on Black Friday, they went dress shopping. She tried on eight dresses that day, but she knew instantly it was dress number one she would say yes to.

From there, the couple picked their wedding party. This was an easy task for Tiffany, but not so much for Terrell. He felt stressed and torn, having to choose between childhood friends and newer relationships with his line brothers. He was able to resolve the matter by asking his childhood friends to stand with him as groomsmen and asking a few of his line brothers to fill other roles within the wedding. Once the wedding party was officially decided upon, Tiffany and Terrell hosted a wedding party get-together and ‘forced’ everyone to get to know each other via assigned seating and fun games.

Next on the list of things to do before they could hit the road in August was choosing their food, cake and flowers. While the two enjoyed a cake tasting- because that’s what you do when you’re engaged; they already knew what kind of cake they would have and so checking that off their list of things to do went smoothly. The same is true for the flowers- it could only ever be red roses, thus the couple was zooming through their checklist. Selecting their reception dinner menu was also a drama free process, however, who would be catering the meal was what some will say, an ordeal. Tiffany, a caterer by trade, was determined to cater her own wedding. After all, why spend the extra money on something she made a business out of doing? Eventually, much to the relief of family and friends, Tiffany was talked down from this ledge and a caterer she worked closely with was tasked with providing the night’s vitals.

When it came time to send out wedding invitations, they were on top of things (ehhh, Tiffany was on top of things, making sure they stayed organized and ahead of the game and Terrell might have been dragging his feet just a tad…) which made handling the next obstacle more of a molehill than the mountain, it could have been. Due to Tiffany’s preparation, invitations went out early and thank goodness, because a month later, they hadn’t gotten any RSVP’s back and no one had mentioned getting theirs in the mail. Guess what? Their wedding invitations had been on a truck that caught fire! AND, the RSVP’s from the few mailed invitations were not delivered because the mail carrier did not know who the ‘Future Mr. and Mrs.’ was, so he never put them in the mailbox. Thankfully, they had an amazing planner, who was able to help them find a solution to the fiasco without adding more stress to the situation.

Looking back, both Tiffany and Terrell feel like this was a defining moment as they prepared to become man and wife, because it made them communicate more effectively with each other and they developed a deeper trust with each other during this process. Terrell would say, “it could always be worse”, which helped Tiffany to stay grounded.

Picking everyone’s wedding attire was an easy task for Tiffany and Terrell. She found her bridesmaids dresses on Amazon, allowed one bridesmaid to wear the same tuxedo as the groomsmen and gave her Maid of Honor a few dresses to choose from. Deciding what the men folk would wear was just as chill for Terrell. He headed to the local Men’s Warehouse to select the black on black tux and was able to send the information out to all of his groomsmen via email, so they could go to their local store without hassle to get wedding ready.

Finally, it was time to hit the road! The time had come to rehearse for their big day. Of course there had to be some final hiccups along the way… As the two prepared to travel to Elizabeth City, North Carolina from Norfolk, Virginia, Terrell realized he had forgotten an extra shirt for the wedding day and so they had to stop twice along the way- to no avail. This did not put a damper on the day and they were able to enjoy the road and their rehearsal, including a traditional dinner at a local restaurant.

Wedding Day

On the morning of the wedding, Terrell had an unexpected opportunity to hangout with his line brothers, while Tiffany greeted the day with a chef in her hotel room, later being joined by her mother, bridesmaids and MUA. After spending a relaxing morning together, the entourage traveled to the Museum of the Albermarle in their pajamas, arriving at the same time as Terrell (shout out to their planner, because she kept them from seeing each other). Tiffany and Terrell opted not to do a first look with each other, but Tiffany did do one with her bridal party; an idea Tiffany reflected on as being both good and bad, because everyone was working hard not to ruin their makeup with tears.

Just before it was time to walk down the aisle, more ‘mayhem’ ensued. Tiffany stood alone in the room, waiting patiently and trying to calm herself when the lights went out. Shrouded in darkness, she had no idea Terrell, who was on the other side of the partition, had hit the switch not realizing it controlled all the lights. The couple shared a laugh over this as Terrell quickly explained that he turned them back on, so Tiffany wasn’t in the dark for long and chaos on their wedding day was avoided.

Terrell looks back on their wedding day fondly, trying to retain every detail, as it felt as if everything flowed together seamlessly. He remembers seeing his bride for the first time, praying and thanking God for providing this woman to him. Tiffany reflects on those same things and smiled as she recalled the mantra she repeated to herself as she walked down the aisle, “just don’t trip over this dress.”

There were other incidentals that happened in the midst of their nuptials, like Terrell’s ring being forgotten (he didn’t have his actual ring until after the wedding), but everything worked out and they advise future couples to remember it will all work out, because what the enemy meant for bad, God means for good. Tiffany assured this writer that she was not a bridezilla, because she was just patient and both agree patience is key when preparing to become one. Additionally, they highly recommend premarital counseling to anyone getting married, as the counseling “breaks you down and builds you back up with your partner.”

“The journey was pretty dope” and it didn’t stop in Elizabeth City. It continued on to Jamaica, where the newlyweds honeymooned and back to Norfolk, where they are living life in wedded bliss.

Vendor Spotlight

And now, since we’re here, let’s share a special shout out to the vendors who made #ittakes2toTatem possible:

Kimberly Johnson
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Writing under the name, Kimberly Jay, Special K has authored Journey to Forgiveness, a 30 day devotional and contributed to many poetry anthologies throughout her extensive professional poetry career. She is a storyteller and uses words to play with imaginations, pull on heart strings and make you see the world as she sees it.

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